…In Florida. We know we’re supposed to wear scarves and boots. We know fall colors are in. We drink Pumpkin Spice Lattes and tweet about them just like the rest of you. But it is still so hot. So. Hot. Our scarves and boots are paired with sundresses and mini skirts (yeah, we don’t really get fall fashion). Our fall colored make-up is melting off our faces. So. Hot. I actually got heat exhaustion on one of my runs recently. Yes, that’s because I didn’t follow my own advice on summer running. I ran in the heat of the day. I did not bring water. Why? Because I can do anything (no, I can’t). I’m a runner. That’s what runners do. After my lovely 13.1 mile run, I threw up. Pardon the over-share… it’s kind of what I do. If you don’t want to know way too many details about my life, you probably shouldn’t be reading my blog (but please do!). My point… Fall is funny here in Florida because it really doesn’t exist, but for some reason, we pretend it does.
You know what else is funny? My girls. Terrible segue, I know. I tried (kind of). Fall in Florida is funny. Kids are funny. And since today is officially the first day of Fall, I am doing a special edition of Funny First, full of quotes from Isla and Aliana. (You and I both know the real reason for this is the fact that I am so for behind on my writing that I never got to it on September first, but we’re going to pretend that it’s the first thing… My blog, my rules).
“You can be the royal breakfast maker! Oh, and don’t forget to keep the castle clean.”
Gee thanks… On the bright side, it kind of has a ring to it. And it is slightly preferable to that time she asked if she could just call me “servant”!
“I have a scar. You know how I know what it’s called? Because I’m smart!”
Yes she is. Modest, not so much.
“Yay! You got me a bloody donut!”
No, it’s not a British thing. It is more commonly known as a Jelly Donut… but look at one sometime… You’ll see.
“When I’m six, I will be a teenager.”
I don’t doubt it.
“Teenagers do whatever they want cause they’re like grown ups.”
Isla really wants a pet kitty… so much in fact that she has already picked out a name: Butterwings Meowy-Cup.
Mom and Dad, “Sweetness” suddenly seems normal, now doesn’t it?
Aliana: Sorry I stepped on your toe mommy.
Me: It’s alright.
Aliana: Otay! I’m gonna do it again!
“Oh ow! My forehead does not want that! My forehead says to not take such big bites”
And that is how a two year old describes brain freeze.
“Can I watch TV? But it has to be Mickey because I hate all the other shows!”
“I want a cookie, and a cookie won’t spill because it’s a cookie. So can I have a cookie?”
She knows exactly how to appeal to a tired mommy who does not want to clean the floors AGAIN! In case you’re wondering, she got the cookie.
Me: I’m going to close the door because I’m blow drying my hair.
(She doesn’t like the noise)
But I’m right in here. If you need anything, you can come in.
…A few seconds later, bursting into the room shouting desperately…
Aliana: I need something! I need something! Help me!
Me: What do you need, Baby?
Aliana: Um I need… I need…
(Looking around the bathroom for an idea)
I need lotion!
Why do I get the feeling she just wanted her mommy? And I don’t mind a all!
It’s a Sister Thing!
Aliana: Let’s play princess!
Isla: Mommy! Oh Mommy! You won’t believe this! Aliana read my mind of what I want to play!
Mmhmm or maybe you both just always want to play princess all the time.
Aliana to Isla: I’m going to make you rich and famous and give you a lot of lollipops!
I was getting more and more frustrated with the fighting taking place in the back seat as I was driving…
Me: Girls! Keep your hands to yourselves until we get home!
Isla to Aliana: We can still hit each other with our heads!
Well I do want to encourage creative solutions and resourceful problem solving.